The main lesson that summer has taught me so far is that I am inherently lazy. It applies to the blog (which has been, up until now, neglected) It applies to soccer, it applies to studying, and it most definitely applies to my spiritual life. It is terrible to say it, but unfortunately it is true. Somehow the very prospect of reading my bible has become work, and though I have nothing at all to do, I somehow found myself neglecting it past the bible study homework I crank out each week.
But then a second lesson has been taught to me over the past week. A simple lesson, but a true lesson, and here it goes: When you ignore God's written plan for your life (the Bible) you miss out on living God's plan for your life.
Now let me explain. Throughout the spring I steadfastly read God's word. I studied it. I craved it, and even though I was busier then than I have been in a long time I stuck to it, and I've felt God work in my life. I've felt his power and for the first time in my life I knew I was exactly where God wanted to be. Then I come home and laziness takes hold. I read sporadically at best, and at crazy hours. And suddenly I wake up one day wondering what it is I'm doing exactly. Sometimes I find myself becoming the greatest argument against my own testimony...and it breaks my heart.
Our pastor Chris at McKinney last week left me ready to go. I knew that I needed to actively seek God. I couldn't passively be a Christian...yet over the past week I've found myself doing things and saying things that I didn't think I thought. I've found little things pop out of my mouth or my actions depicting things I hate. I have been lazy and weak and I believe the root of the problem lies in the fact that while my mentaility has been "live for God" I haven't fed my mind with anything worth my time.
But today I read Ron Block's commentary on Romans...and something really spoke out to me:
26 Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities,
“Helps” is from a word meaning the Holy Spirit takes hold of our weaknesses. Imagine trying to lift something and being unable, and a strong friend comes alongside and does it for you. That’s the idea. Paul said the same thing in 2Cor 12:9-10, where the Lord says to Paul, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” Paul goes on to say, “Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.” When we acknowledge our total weakness and inability to live the Christian life, that is exactly the point at which the Holy Spirit can come alongside and do it for us, through us, as us.
So maybe God works through our mess ups. Maybe he uses our mistakes to revamp us, to remind us that we need him. To remind us that he is the God of all Gods and we can't live our lives running in circles without his direction. So, as of right now, once again, I'm acknowledging my complete inability to live the Christian life. I mess up, constantly, and without the Holy Spirit, I'm up a creek with only one paddle: I'm spinning in circles. Today, I say I can do nothing without God. And today I recommit myself to becoming an ACTIVE christian, not a passive one. I'll end with a quote from the infamously intelligent doctor Gregory House.
"Do it all, or nothing, or option C. You're a liar and a hypocrite."
I challenge everyone who reads this, Christian or not, to reconsider our lifestyles. Lets try and make sure we're as consistent as possible with what we claim to believe, and we live our lives to uphold the standards we claim with our lips.
a little break
3 years ago